When it comes to the idea of “selfish”, there are two basic camps: those who preach that you should NOT be selfish, and those who preach that you SHOULD be selfish. Naturally, both camps believe that their own respective positions favor the betterment of society.
Who’s right? Well, it depends on definitions – which you may notice are seldom if ever forthcoming from people who preach to you about anything.
Nevertheless, one could potentially see the merit of either side, again depending on if & how they would particularly define “selfish”. However, instead of trying to explain for them, I shall simply explain my own definitions & distinctions as follows.
For me, it’s pretty simple, really, as it comes down to two key definitions, between which one can and must make a clear distinction:
Self-centred – Self-centred people see themselves as the centre of their own universe. As such, they take full responsibility for anything that happens in it, knowing that everything they experience is at least partially a product of their own thoughts, words or deeds. In point of fact, I personally subscribe to this mentality as being a mature, responsible and noble one.
Selfish – Selfish people see themselves as the centre of the universe. As such, they take little if any responsibility for anything that happens in it. While they feel that they deserve control, they won’t accept any of the responsibility for anything they experience as a result of either exercising or failing to exercise that control. So you can see that selfish people are very often immature & cowardly as well.
Well, there you have it. My perspective on two alternatives. Either pick the one that suits you or create yet another to suit yourself, as you will.
Regardless of your choice, though, I suggest you consider the words of Antoine de Saint-Exupery: “If you are to be, you must begin by assuming responsibility. You alone are responsible for every moment of your life, for every one of your acts.”
Indeed.